With today's busy lifestyles, many
parents and grandparents want to spend more "quality" time with their
children or grandchildren. But what is quality time? "Quality time"
is time spent doing an activity that is meaningful to the parent and child. It
is time when family members really get to know each other. Quality time is
spent focusing attention on the other person and sharing thoughts and feelings.
Spending time with our children can be fun and educational for us and for them.
Much of the child's basic learning takes place in the many informal situations
that occur daily in the life of the family. These informal occasions for
learning include all the times the family members are together doing ordinary
things, such as getting dressed, talking over the day’s happenings, dealing
with problems, interacting with people outside the family, taking baths,
eating, and so forth.
Children need to know they are loved unconditionally. The cry of children today
is, "Love me for who I am, not what I do. Love me for being who I am, even
when I am naughty, not winning, placing, and showing". That does not mean
that you have to approve of everything the child does. What it does mean
however, is that even though the child misbehaves, we still love and accept the
child and provide support.
The activity does need not be costly, but rather one that satisfies both the parent and the child.
Children learn about families from the time they spend in their own families.
They learn about birth and caring for another person when a new baby comes home
from the hospital. They learn about loss when a family member dies. They learn
about marriage and relationships by watching their mothers and fathers
interact. By living in a family, children learn to share, how to stand up for
their own rights, and how to love another person.
We help children develop positive self-esteem by communicating the value we
feel for the child. Words of encouragement and love help provide children with
the courage to try new things without worrying excessively about not being able
to do them.
Children learn about trust at home from their parents. They learn trust from
being trusted. When we trust the child to accomplish a task on his or her own,
the child learns that he or she can do the task.
To help our children grow and mature well, we should help children learn about
life and living in today's society. The time a parent spends with a child is
important. But it can be scary as well. Unstructured time together when the TV
is off can be a bit of a shock.
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